


(my lover, my lover, my love) we can never go back

by everyotherfreckle



Series: if you'd call me now baby, i'd come running [1]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Finnrey fridays, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-27
Updated: 2016-08-27
Packaged: 2018-08-11 07:54:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7882957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everyotherfreckle/pseuds/everyotherfreckle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>finn is in a bit of a bind. rey helps him out. text messages are exchanged in the process.</p><p>//</p><p>basically the prelude to <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/6174985">i'm on call (to be there)</a> + a bunch of text conversations.</p>
            </blockquote>





	(my lover, my lover, my love) we can never go back

**Author's Note:**

> this is the precursor to one of my other fics, [i'm on call (to be there)](http://archiveofourown.org/works/6174985), which you don't really have to read to understand this one but, still. it would be dope if you read it :)

[3:25PM] FINN: rey

[3:27PM] FINN: rey i did something stupid

[3:29PM] FINN: REY I DID SOMETHING SO STUPID PLS ANSWER ME

[3:32PM] REY: how stupid?

[3:33PM] REY: like 'need to change ur phone number' stupid or 'need to change ur name + move to paraguay' stupid???

[3:35PM] FINN: paraguay. definitely paraguay.

[3:36PM] FINN: i quit my job and now I AM GOING TO BE HOMELESS

[3:39PM] REY: WAIT WHAT.

[3:39PM] REY: YOU QUIT??!!!???!!

[3:40PM] REY: I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE PROUD OF YOU

[3:41PM] FINN: did u miss the part about me being homeless??

[3:49PM] REY: ok im sneaking out of my class. call me!!!

*

When Finn woke up that morning, he definitely had no intention of abruptly getting rid of his only source of income but - he didn't think he could go on one more second working for those soulless bastards at First Order Security.

Especially when today was the day his boss - Ben ' _the dick_ ' Solo, as Rey calls him - decided to be the worst human being he could possibly be. After the third time he got on Finn's case for not pushing a sell - as if he was really going to pressure an eighty year-old woman into upgrading her already ridiculously overpriced and ridiculously unnecessary security system - he just sort of...snapped.

"Wait, so tell me again what you said. Word for word!" Rey was sitting on his couch - the couch he'll probably have to sell if he wants to, you know, eat - listening delightfully to Finn's retelling of exactly how he quit.

"I told him that I would call him a piece of shit, but that would be an insult to actual pieces of shit." Finn says, unable to stay sour-faced as Rey dissolves into a fit of giggles. "Rey, that's not funny. I shouldn't have flipped like that. Now I don't have a job so there's no way I'm gonna be able to keep paying for my car, let alone this apartment."

Rey stops laughing, and frowns. He doesn't want to upset her, but he is kind of freaking out about all of this.

"Finn, security sales were never your passion. You're an artist. Maybe this is the universe's way of telling you it's time to pursue that!"

Art was always a hobby of Finn's and never something he seriously considered making a career out of. In fact, Rey was the only person who ever believed Finn would be some hugely famous artist. Sometimes she believed in him more than he believed in himself, which a lot of the time he needed.

So after he was honorably discharged from the army, Finn went straight to the First Order and never really did much in way of his art outside of the occasional doodles or quick canvas pieces he would paint for Rey.

Maybe now he actually did have a chance to get back into the swing of things.

"Okay, but what am I gonna do for money? I still need to at least try and be a functioning adult."

"I can talk to my dad about letting you work in his gallery? You could, I don't know, teach the kids' classes or something." She leans over and rests her hand on top of his. "Finn, I will personally make sure you are not broke and homeless, okay?"

It was times like these Finn wonders what he ever did to deserve a best friend like Rey.

*

[2:10AM] REY: finn are you up?

[2:13AM] REY: finnnnnnnnn

[2:20AM] FINN: what do u want rey? it's like 7 in the morning

[2:23AM] REY: it's only 2 drama queen and i was thinking about your living situation

[2:29AM] FINN: ....u think about me before u go to sleep???????

[2:29AM] FINN: that's so scandalous ;)

[2:32AM] REY: SHUT UP DORK

[2:34AM] REY: i was thinking you could move in with me! save money while you work for my dad and stuff

[2:52AM] FINN: can i sleep on that?

[3:02AM] REY: sure.

[3:05AM] REY: night finn :)

[3:05AM] FINN: sweet dreams rey

*

"So there's a children's class every weekday after school and two classes each day on weekends. You can teach those, but you're gonna have to come up with productive lesson plans. And because you're practically my kid, I can bend the budget a bit and pay you ten bucks an hour."

Finn was making fifteen-an-hour at the Order but he's not about to start complaining. Luke is doing him a huge favor - hiring someone with no teaching background to teach - so Finn isn't going to be ungrateful and start asking for more money.

"Thanks so much, Luke. I am forever in your debt." Finn says as the two of them walk out of what's to be his new classroom at Luke's art studio/gallery/artistic rec center.

Luke laughs, clapping a hand on his shoulder. "I thought you were forever in my debt your sophomore year when you dented your foster parents' car and I covered for you?"

Yeah. Finn has known Luke _that_ long. He's basically an honorary Skywalker at this point.

"Consider me _doubly_ forever in your debt then." Finn checks his watch and grimaces when he sees he's already a few minutes late. "Can I email you about the details later today? I’m supposed to meet Rey for lunch and I'm late."

Luke gives a low whistle. "Yeah you better go. You know how she gets when people get between her and food."

Finn nods, knowing there are probably several _hangry_ texts from Rey on his phone.

"I'll email you later, Finn. See you this weekend!"

With that, Finn takes off. If he doesn't get to Panera in the next ten minutes, chances are he might not even make it to this weekend.

*

[2:10PM] REY: you're ten minutes late, finn.

[2:15PM] REY: fifteen now. im so hungry i think im gonna pass out

[2:18PM] REY: you are officially buying fyi. you're not jobless anymore so you gets none of my sympathy!

[2:25PM] REY: DOES 'MEET ME AT PANERA AT 2' NOT MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU?!!!

[2:28PM] REY: i see u walking in right now

[2:29PM] REY: stop smiling at me you're late and im hungry

[2:30PM] REY: aw you're wearing the shirt i got you!! how sweet!!

[2:30PM] REY: but im still mad at you

*

Finn thought about it a lot and, moving in with Rey just made sense. He could save his money faster, considering his half of the rent would be way lower than what it was at his apartment. Plus the gallery was closer to her place than his was and it was right around the corner from the community college Rey went to so they could always just carpool if need be. It was just an option that made a ton of sense to him.

But apparently it made no sense to any of his friends.

"Big mistake, buddy." Poe says, slicing his shot and just missing the corner pocket.

Snap is leaning against the pool table, nursing his beer and nodding his head. "Girls and guys can't live together unless they're having sex. That's just science, dude."

Finn shakes his head, lining up his shot and hitting the solid red ball into the appropriate pocket. "You two are idiots. Rey and I are just friends. Have been since we were, like, ten. It's literally gonna be like living with my sister."

"Sure, if the two of you were Jaime and Cersei Lannister." Poe groans as Finn sinks yet another ball. "All I'm saying is, this is either gonna end in your friendship being ruined completely, or the two of you having what could arguably be the world's cutest kid."

"Yeah, you're an attractive dude, Finn, and Rey's sort of really hot so your kid would be pretty good looking." Snap mumbles into the rim of his beer bottle.

"Snap," Finn narrows his eyes, turning his attention toward him. "If you ever call Rey hot again, I will shave off your left eyebrow. And we all know that's the better of the two."

Poe clicks his tongue and follows it up with a long dramatic sigh. "And the weird alpha male boyfriend feelings begin."

*

[5:25PM] FINN: hey can you help me move my stuff into rey's place?

[6:15PM] POE: Sure thing!

[6:16PM] POE: Still a bad idea though!!

[6:45PM] FINN: poe.........shut up

[6:48PM] FINN: also thank you

*

"So we got milk, eggs, whole wheat bread since you're on a health kick and - " Finn stops pushing the cart in the middle of the cereal aisle once he realizes Rey isn't actually paying any attention to him. Mainly because she's somehow lifted his phone from his jacket pocket and is currently taking a selfie. "Hey! What are you - "

Rey shimmies just out of his reach, looking all too pleased with herself as she points the phone's camera at him.

"You're on Snapchat aren't you?" It's an obvious question Finn already knows the answer to because Rey is _always_ on Snapchat. "You know, you're always posting selfies to my story and it is really killing my game with the other girls that follow me."

"Well it's only fair since you're always putting up stupid videos of yourself on _my_ Instagram." Rey comments snapping another picture, this time with him in frame behind her.

Finn only shrugs. They both do sort of misuse the others' social media accounts.

"And besides, it's not like I'm saying I'm your girlfriend or anything."

"Okay, if a guy you were following had a girl Snapping about the two of them doing things like grocery shopping and doing laundry and taking trips to Ikea, what would you think?"

Rey scrunches her nose in that way she always does when she's thinking. "Yeah, I guess I see how that could be misconstrued. I can stop if it really bothers you."

Finn scoffs, grabbing a box of Apple Jacks and putting it in their cart. "Nah, don't even worry about it. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, I kind of like when you post stuff to my story. Makes me seem more interesting."

There's a moment - albeit a brief one - where the two of them are standing in front of the Cinnamon Toast Crunch, grinning at each other, when Finn feels a sort of knot form in his stomach. He's sure it's just because he hasn't eaten in a few hours. That's it. He's just hungry. Nothing else.

"In fact, we should just make this official right now. Gimme your phone." Rey does as Finn asks and places her iPhone in his open hand. "We've been friends for almost fifteen years and now since we're living together, it's time we finally did this."

Finn drops to one knee and turns her phone towards her to let her see what he's been doing. He has his contact information open only he's changed his name from ' _FINN_ ' to ' _HUBBY_ '.

"Finn!" Rey harshly whispers to him, her eyes incredibly wide. The grocery store is actually pretty busy today and he is very aware how this could look to someone who was to just waltz by. "Get up before someone thinks you're actually proposing!"

"Not until you say yes." Finn smirks. "Will you be my phone-wife?"

Rey rolls her eyes, despite the smile on her lips. "Yes! Now stand up!"

Finn pumps his fist and stands back up on both feet. She hands him his phone, having changed her contact to ' _WIFEY_ '.

"Alright," he says, tucking the device back in his pocket. "Should we post something that says we're newlyweds now or would that be too much?"

"You're such a dork." Rey playfully knocks her shoulder into his. "Let's just go get some frozen waffles so we can go home already."

*

[12:15PM] HUBBY: hey, are you still at your dad's?

[12:32PM] HUBBY: rey please answer me.

[1:40PM] HUBBY: can we at least talk about what happened last night?

[3:05PM] HUBBY: look im not sure what you what me to say or do here. just please dnt be mad at me

[7:19PM] HUBBY: i know you're reading these. i'll be at home waiting if you decide to come back tonight

[10:20PM] HUBBY: Attached: 1 Image

[10:20PM] HUBBY: as u can see, im very sad without you here :(

[12:02AM] HUBBY: guess you aren't coming back tonight

[12:13AM] HUBBY: sweet dreams rey

*

Finn doesn't know how everything went so wrong so fast.

Their first month of living together was fantastic. In fact, he would go so far as to call it domestic bliss, but the second month. The second month was just complete shit.

It all started with an (extremely stupid) argument.

Finn went out one night with the guys and had a little too much to drink and ended up being a complete idiot and brought a girl home. Thankfully he regained _some_ sense of right and wrong before things went too far and his female friend ended up leaving before she even saw the inside of his bedroom. They were, however, sort of loud and ended up waking Rey. To say she was pissed was an understatement.

The next morning, by the time Finn woke up, Rey had already gone to class. He had figured she just wanted an early start. He actually had no clue she was even upset with him until she got home that night, her trademark look of irritation all over her face.

After a tense dinner, Finn finally worked up the courage to ask what was wrong.

"Did I do something wrong?" He asked, washing both of their dishes in an effort to get her to stop scowling at him.

Rey was quiet for a long moment before she answered. "Besides stumbling in drunk at three in the morning with some girl you barely know, nope. You've been the perfect angel."

Finn stopped scrubbing at the plate to face her. "Are you more upset about the drunk part or the girl part? Because I feel like you're more upset about the girl part."

Looking back, Finn knows he should _not_ have said that.

Rey glared at him, eyes ablaze. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know, Rey. It's just we've both went out and gotten tipsy before and you were fine with it but the minute I do it with a girl that isn't you, you suddenly take issue with it."

"Are you really that self-centered to think that's why I'm pissed?" She stood from the couch, arms folded over her chest. "How would you feel if I came in late at night sucking face with some guy in the hallway right outside _your_ bedroom?"

Finn walked into the living room, prepared to continue their disagreement. "I would be fine with it because you're an adult woman who can suck face with whoever you want to."

Rey laughed rather sarcastically which Finn took some offense to.

"Oh, please. You would be walking around pouting for the next three days. Just like you did that time my senior year of high school when you heard that Nines and I made out at Slip's Halloween party."

"For the millionth time, I was only upset because Nines was an asshole who was just trying to hook up with you to piss me off!"

Finn regretted saying it as soon as the last word left his mouth. He's told her the part about Nines being an ass plenty of times, but never about Nines only wanting to get with her to upset Finn.

"Why would him hooking up with me make you mad?" Rey asked, way too insightful for his liking.

"Because," Finn searched for just about any reasonable answer that wasn't the truth. "He knew I thought he was no good for you."

Rey rolled her eyes. "Oh please, you said the exact same thing about that kid in my shop class - "

"Who was a known serial cheater!"

" - And the barista at Starbucks - "

"The day I let you date a guy with a tribal tattoo is the day I cease being your best friend."

" - And I'm pretty that's why you hated your boss so much, because he flirted with me at that Christmas party you took me to."

"Okay but Ben is _actually_ a giant dick. I was just trying to save you from getting involved with that."

Rey sighed, looking more tired than upset with him, which Finn took as a small win. "Point is Finn, you find something wrong with literally every guy I talk to."

Finn bristled, gaze dropping to his feet. "That's because no guy you've ever talked to has been good enough for you. You deserve someone who's gonna treat you like the incredibly special person you are."

"Well, you treat me like that." It was the quietest thing she had said during their entire argument. Though it was the thing that spoke the loudest.

"Yeah, but that's only because - "

"No, according to your own logic, the only guy good enough for me would be you. Is that what you think?"

And, no, of course that isn't what Finn thought. He knew there was someone out there that was her other half, someone that wasn't him. Their connection was strictly a platonic one; there was nothing romantic about it at all.

Before he could even attempt to articulate what he was really trying to say, Rey kissed him. Finn vaguely remembers trying (rather half-heartedly) to push her away because it was weird, right? They were childhood friends and childhood friends shouldn't kiss. And they certainly shouldn't do anything more than kiss but that's what the two of them ended up doing.

He probably would never admit it unless under extreme duress, but Finn had thought about sharing this sort of intimacy with Rey more times than perhaps he should have. The real thing, however, far exceeded anything his imagination ever came up with.

By the time it was over, Finn couldn't even remember what they were arguing about in the first place. The only thing he could pay any attention to was every dip and curve of Rey's body as he traced along her skin with his hands. He wanted to commit this to memory, to forever be able to recall exactly what she looked like lying next to him, spent and content. Finn traced and traced until his eyelids grew heavy and he couldn't keep them open a second longer.

When he woke up, she was gone, and had been gone for two days now. The only reason Finn wasn't _completely_ wrecked with worry was because Luke had the decency to call him and let him know Rey was staying with him and that she was relatively fine. Apparently she was really emotional and was keeping to herself, but besides that, she was okay. He told Finn that it would be best to just give her some space and that she'd come around in a few days.

Finn was finding it hard to heed that advice.

Finn hated that Poe was right.

*

[1:10AM] WIFEY: Attached: 1 Image

[1:10AM] WIFEY: im pretty sad without you too

[1:34AM] HUBBY: so you don't talk to me for three days and then decide to send me a selfie at 1am???

[1:37AM] HUBBY: how do u look so cute this late at night??

[1:40AM] WIFEY: i was going for sad you dork, not cute!!

[1:42AM] HUBBY: oh. well you missed sad by a mile and landed firmly on cute :)

[1:46AM] WIFEY: im coming home tomorrow. we need to talk.

[1:47AM] HUBBY: good. i'll be waiting

[1:50AM] WIFEY: night finn

[1:50AM] HUBBY: sweet dreams rey :)

*

Normally when he watches _Chopped_ , Finn is absolutely engrossed in it. Normally when he watches it, Rey is right beside him on the couch, judging the dishes alongside him like they do every week. Tonight, however, he isn’t paying any real attention to it. It’s serving more as background noise than actual entertainment. He’s way too busy nervously eyeing the door. Rey said she would be home tonight and Finn has been sitting on the couch since six-thirty waiting for her to come through the door.

Just as the show is going to commercial, the front door opens and Finn leaps off of the couch. It hasn’t even been that long since he’s last seen her – just three and a half days – but he can’t remember the last time he’s gone this long without seeing _and_ speaking to her. Even back when he was in the service they found time to text each other at least once a day. So obviously the past couple of days have been weird to say the least.

Finn waits for Rey to enter the living room, hands fidgeting at his sides because he really wants to hug her – he hasn’t seen her in three days, dammit – but he’s pretty sure any sort of touching between them is off limits at the moment. He searches her face for any indication on how she’s feeling. She doesn’t look mad at him, which is a good thing. He would hate for her to have came back for the sole purpose of arguing.

“Hey.” He finally says, settling on just sticking his hands in the pockets of the sweater he wore. “Long time, no see. Or speak. You look well – “

“Okay Finn, listen. I have this entire speech in my head so just let me get through it and then we can do this whole awkward thing, alright?” Rey says before taking a deep breath. “I don’t know if you are or ever were aware, but I have had a gigantic crush on you since I was, like, fifteen. And the only reason I realized I had this crush was because of Victoria Neely.”

Finn vaguely remembers her. She was a senior when he was a junior and Rey was a sophomore. He briefly dated her – if you could even call it that – for about a month until she broke up with him after an incident with Rey during gym class in which Victoria ended up with a broken nose via a volleyball. Finn didn’t even really like Victoria so he was never too broken up about the whole thing. Although, now he’s curious as to what she has to do with any of this.

Rey ducks her head, suddenly looking quite embarrassed. “I purposely aimed that volleyball at her face because you ditched me that one time to go hang out with her. It just made me so mad and I didn’t even know why until I was talking about it with my dad and he told me I must have some sort of… _feelings_ for you that go beyond friendship.

“But you always referred to me as your best friend so I never pushed the issue. And then time passed and I thought I was over it, but then you had to bring that stupid girl in here and, I don’t know, it just popped this ridiculously blissful domestic bubble we had been living in for the past month.”

Rey huffs, standing up straight so she can look him in the eye. “Anyway, I’m sorry I kissed you and I’m _really_ sorry all that _other_ stuff happened, too. I understand if things are too weird now and you wanna move out and, I don’t know, put some limitations on our friendship or whatever but – “

He knows she wanted him to wait until she was finished, but he can’t just let her stand there and assume incorrect things about how he views their situation.

“Rey wait,” Finn approaches her, his hands resting on her shoulders. “You were right the other night when you said I always find fault in every guy you’re interested in. The only reason I did that was because I sort of had a crush on you too.”

“You did?” She asks incredulously.

“Yeah, I did. Huge one, in fact.” Finn laughs and runs his hands down her arms to take her hands in his. “So, no, things are not weird, I do not want to move out and I definitely don’t want to put limitations on our friendship. In fact, I was wondering if we could do the opposite.”

Rey smiles, seemingly catching on to what he’s proposing. “And what would be the opposite of that?”

Finn laces their fingers together and pulls her over the couch to sit beside them. He throws an arm over her shoulder and she gladly snuggles closer to him.

“I figure since you’re back, we have the whole night to discuss the details of our new _expanded_ relationship. For now, though,” he grabs the remote, turning the volume up a few notches. “We should watch our favorite show.”

*

[2:13PM] HUBBY: i had my students draw their favorite thing today and look what i drew :)

[2:13PM] HUBBY: Attached: 1 Image

[2:15PM] WIFEY: finn, you got my nose all wrong.

[2:17PM] HUBBY: brb telling the kids just how heartless my girlfriend is

[2:18PM] WIFEY: IM KIDDING BABE. you know i love it :)

[2:18PM] WIFEY: and i love you!!

[2:21PM] HUBBY: …did you just drop the L-bomb on me via text??

[2:21PM] HUBBY: smh u don’t have a romantic bone in your body

[2:26PM] WIFEY: if you ever wanna see this body again you should probably take that back

[2:27PM] HUBBY: okay im sorry you are VERY romantic

[2:28PM] HUBBY: and i love you too!!!!

[2:31PM] WIFEY: four exclamation marks??

[2:32PM] WIFEY: can’t believe im in love with such a dork

[2:33PM] HUBBY: BELIEVE IT BABE!!!!! BECAUSE IM ALL YOURS!!!!

[2:35PM] WIFEY: that you are :)

**Author's Note:**

> so i meant to contribute this to this week's finnrey friday (do text messages count as social media???) but i was lazy and took too long to edit it. womp. anywho, i hoped you all liked it! it's really fun writing in this style (with random ~paragraphs~ of text messages) and hopefully inspiration will strike and i can expand in this verse bc idk i like it!
> 
> but yeah, kudos/comments are always appreciated!!! thank you for reading!!


End file.
